The MCAT Ultra

Thursday, August 24, I completed possibly one of the hardest exams I have ever taken. After 7:03 tedious hours, I had ended my life long streak of #NeverStopStudying. For now...

The journey to the finish is never what we anticipate when we take the first step. It is fraught with obstacles and surprise hardships. However, we always seem to come out triumphant in our efforts and with more knowledge of our selves. And that is the ultra way.

Like most long races, we build a base of endurance and tolerance. From April until June, I reviewed every concept in science and math I had ever learned: psychology, sociology, chemistry both general and organic, biology, biochemistry, physics, and more. During this, I was working full time. I am actually grateful, in some ways, that I had torn my calf in March. For it allowed me to wake up at 4 am to study until 7, before working and to have time in the evenings to also take comprehension tests. I had been training to compete at Lavaredo but I simply underestimated the amount I would need to give to my books. All in all, during these months I would work & study about 65-75 hours per week, with no time for the trails. I also doubt the 50lb weight limit would apply to my books alone if I had travelled to Italy.

Quality WS cheerleading

Visiting Rory!

I eventually took June-August mostly off and only worked 1-2 days per week. Initially, when planning the year, I had aspirations of camping nearly every day, running long mountain miles, and studying my textbooks by the campfire under the trees. However, like most things in life, the reality is entirely different than what we expect. Given my injury recovery, I was barely running at all. And most of my studying lasted 8+ hours on days off of work, usually requiring cell service. For some time, I was getting out for "long runs" the Sunday evening after I would finish a 7 hour practice exam. When it got down to the wire, even this dissipated into loops around Seattle. I had deleted all of my social media apps except for Instagram, and I longingly followed my friends' adventures, experiences and excursions. It was frustrating at times, but I don't regret the sacrifice. 

Geting ready!

In the course of 50 miles or longer, it is almost inevitable that we have lows and doubt ourselves. This was perhaps my biggest struggle. I had days where I couldn't remember simple concepts for the life of me. Or that I just didn't understand what was meant by the information presented. The frustration by my lack of progress (and sleep), despite trying my absolute best, wrecked my confidence. This frustration created so much doubt and anxiety that I would struggle through my weekly practice exams. Unable to focus, I would score poorly and reinforce the doubt. It was almost cyclical and impossible to rid myself of. However, I armed myself against this and comforted my thoughts by knowing I was doing absolutely everything in my power to pursue this. I let the passion, desire, curiosity for knowledge guide me in my studies and fuel my determination. This was what I wanted more than anything and I was not going to be apathetic or complacent in my pursuits.

I found many new ways to study and really incorporate the MCAT into my life. I listened to Kahn Academy videos (Sal I love you) on my runs and would pause them so that I could quiz myself. Yes, I realize I must have seemed like a crazy person muttering about theta this times that is the torque of whatnot and gesturing wildly with my arms. I would find review sites/blogs and take notes on their notes and then make flashcards with the headers. With these flashcards, I would lie in my bed at night and try to discuss everything I knew about the topics. I took pictures of the comprehension tests or practice passages and completed these during any break I would have at work. I tried to relate patients and people in my life to psychology disorders/ stages of development. I lived and breathed this test.

The week of the test finally came, albeit much faster than I anticipated. Eerily, I felt calm. I knew I had done a great deal of work and exhausted my capabilities to prepare myself to reach my potential. I was emboldened knowing I had no regrets or "shoulda coulda woulda's." In a way, my test was like the penultimate ultra race. I tapered off of studying and just relaxed; reviewing the occasional notecards and sleeping lot. I prepared my "race kit" of my lucky T shirt, lucky Superman underwear, "Carpe The Fuck Out of This Diem" socks, slippers and my bag of goodies the day before. On test day, I woke up after a fitful night and ran in the dark to Meredith Grey's house for a quick adrenaline shake out. I drank my coffee, ate my breakfast and drove to the start (test center). I had packed all kinds of snacks and peppermint tea hydration for the allotted breaks. Each time I entered the test room, I had to pass security more stringent than TSA: I was fingerprinted three times, my ID checked, my glasses were inspected, a metal detector wand, and my "suspicious" friendship bracelet had to be cut off.

The first section is always my worst: chemistry and physics, and it was really, really hard. I tried not to let this shake my resolve and to remain calm. I exited the room looking like a stunned deer in headlights: wide eyed and difficult to collect my thoughts. I spent the ten minute break breathing deeply and meditating. I thought of my favorite Eminem/Sia songs and used them as a mantra. I went into the reading & comprehension section ready for more. That one was uneventful and I spent the longer 30 minute break after gearing up for my favorite and best sections: Biology & biochem and psychology & sociology. These flew by and buoyed my confidence. I felt intelligent and prepared with careful consideration for each answer selected. When I finally finished the test, 7:03 hours later, I got into the front seat of my car and cried. The sobbing was mixed with intermittent hysterical laughing; I do not know how to surmise the waves of emotions that flooded over me. It was indescribable. I quickly dried my tears and changed to my running clothes. I sprinted through 6 miles around the area on a local bike path. I kept trying to push faster, faster to help dissipate the building adrenaline. I screamed out at the halfway mark. I skipped around mile 5. I really just couldn't contain myself anymore.

post practice exam respite

I spent the rest of the weekend with my good friends celebrating a birthday in Disneyland. Making the trip down to LA was awesome and we had such a good time. Other than my excessive "nerd vomit" (ie calculating my gravitational potential energy and the max velocity on Splash Mountain or the centripetal force of the Teacups ride), I almost forgot that I will not have my scores for another month.  The waiting game will be difficult, but I am so happy that it is (sort of) over. I can finally relax and be a real person.

I am truly so lucky to have had the opportunity to study and prepare for this exam. My work has been super accommodating to let me take time off and still hold my job. My family, friends, previous classmates, the doctors I work for, and many people have all wished me the very best and tried to help in any way they could. I am so grateful to really have a squad stand behind me while I'm chasing my dreams. It's never easy and the journey is far from over, but I am very fortunate to have the kind of encouragement I do in all my pursuits. Now, happy trails!

I can finally Stop #NeverStopStudying... for now...

Question Madness

The North Face is celebrating the 50th anniversary. Though, I have not even been around for half of that time, it is inspiring to see the expeditions and progress that has been made as the brand reminisces on it's journey. It is also fascinating to see the new adventures and limits pushed by the athletes as they jump into the unknown future. Here are my thoughts with a storytelling exercise they have been promoting:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ayv41ZmNWtk

Why live a life that’s perceived as mad? As Jack Kerouac so aptly put it, “The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes ‘Awww!’”.

Most of the world spends their time maintaining boundaries of safe, conventional, inconspicuous lifestyles that conform to set norms. With stringent social policies governing our actions, starting early in our formative years, individuality and risks are squashed; the teenager that enjoys solitude outdoors rather than on the football team is isolated. Our parents, through love and care, seek to protect us constantly in the face of danger, as we are often scooped up into their arms right before jumping off the monkey bars. Even evolution’s Natural Selection strikes fear into our chest as we peer over the cliff’s edge and hesitantly plant our feet farther back. However, with every aspect of our lives working against this infectious madness, we still break free of the boundaries towards the farther, higher, harder, and unknown.

 I live my life through passion. My affinity for the outdoors and pursuing new sights to behold is fueled by a captive wonder of nature’s intricacies. My academic zeal sets the tone for my curiosity of what the human body can accomplish physiologically. My manic desire for dreaming big is constantly churning creative adventures in the recesses of my mind, one that can push my mental attitude deeper than most would be willing. I consciously choose pain, discomfort, “to suck the marrow out of life” (Thoreau) than the sheltered vanilla. I may appear to be conforming to the mundane: commuting, working, studying, and exercising; but my goals far exceed reality: I want the prestigious accolades of medical school and to run longer, farther & faster. I have always been set apart from my peers at university or in the workplace to pursue my athletics & academics. I am repeatedly foregoing social interactions and expectations, but I wouldn’t have it any other way as it can be a raging party of one. Sometimes I would wake as early as 3:45 am in order to train in the mountains before heading to work, after which I would spent the evening hours poring over textbooks, only to repeat again and again. This kind of lifestyle did not allow for attendance of prom afterparties or frat beer pong Olympics. Often, I am completing these tasks solo, save for the company of a few quality friends.

 I am mostly asked “why”, as the people around me do not understand what drives a person to live like this. I usually cannot answer why exactly, but feel it as I stand next to an impossibly tall tree while sweat drips down my cheek onto the smooth dirt of my favorite trail crunching below. As I gaze out at a vast expanse of beauty unfolding before me, I rejoice in the unknown and untouched land, save for the vibrant wildlife inhabitants. That fleeting moment where the golden sunlight illuminates my tango with the dancing shadows echoes throughout my dreams. The wind blowing through my hair, the flower crushed in my pocket, and the tight strain in my filthy legs rejuvenates me. Being brought to my knees after emptying the whole of my being running farther and faster than I ever have imagined brings a whimsical smile to my face. Tender moments that we, as explorers, are privy to stumble across are why & what we spend a lifetime chasing. Sometimes, though, I am tired, and would rather stay home than walk out the front door. But the will to be much greater than I am keeps me both intrinsically motivated and intrinsically satisfied. I always tell myself: This is my passion. This is what I strive for. This is madness.

Black Canyon 100k. #QuittersNeverWin

So much Happy

Three weeks ago I had the best training week after one of the best buildup I've ever had. Starting soon after TNF Chile 100 mile attempt, I intended on earning a golden ticket to Western States 100. Over winter break, I had a couple awesome training runs on the course, which lit the fire even brighter. Running 35 miles for Camille Herrons birthday with the Queen was the best. Putting in long solo miles in slo was mentally tough, but instilled a confidence in myself that was unprecedented. Three weeks ago, Meghan gave me a workout that scared me. The mile repeats were set at a pace way faster than I had ever done and the doubt was high. I crushed it though. I didn't know that I could do that and still feel so fresh, despite being in the midst of a 92 mile week. It got me really excited for Black Canyon 100k- the race for the golden ticket. 

That Friday, I was gliding through SLO's neon green hills and imagining the best possible scenario at BC. I was giddy with the possibilities that could unfold and not a trace of doubt was in my mind. The next day I did my medium long run out in Santa Margarita. I greatly underestimated the climbing in those 18 miles but knew it's a route I always get dehydrated on. I wanted race prep to be flawless. However, halfway through the run I felt a little something tweaking in my low back/ butt area. I thought maybe it was a bruise from some dance move pulled downtown at my roommates 21st birthday celebration. So I ignored it and pressed on.

That night the little pain never went away. I woke up the next morning for my 32 miler and tried to stretch it out. I met my professor Nicole Kulikov (3x OTQ marathoner speed demon and newfound trail buddy) for the first part of the run. We were moving super well on the rocky trails but the pain never went away. Gradually it got worse and worse, slowing me down. Running back down the road with her it was agonizing pain. I had to stop and go home. Nothing I did, short of sleeping, alleviated the awful pain. 

The dream

She told me it was my SI joint. She had gone through similar injury after the 2008 Olympic trials. For the next two weeks everything I did was painful. I only sought relief biking and sleeping. I didn't want to wake up in the morning and go to class or do anything. It was very depressing and I felt trapped. I could see all my hard work and dreams unraveling and that filled my heart with anguish. Since I was severely handicapped and couldn't run, I sought to ease my frustration with baking. Inspired by Steph Howe, I made almond croissants and biscotti among other things. Meanwhile, I tried everything. I saw a chiropractor, sports massage, and went to physical therapy. The week before BC I all of a sudden had the pain diminish in my daily activities. The PT was helping and making me stronger. She diagnosed my injury as a nonfunctional glute. Instead of firing and doing work, my hip flexor took over and pulled on my low back.

She was confident that I could run black canyon and excitedly I regained hope. Wednesday, at the last possible second, Meghan and I decided to go for it. I packed my bags and hopped on my flight. I met up with Keely Henninger and we hung out in Tempe with her friend Hillary. Keely was running the 60k and Hillary volunteered to pace me the last 11 miles. 

Pre race hip thrusts are all the rage

Day of the race, I diligently did my glute exercises in the gym and mingled with running friends. We meandered out to the start line and off we went into the desert. The sunrise was spectacular. The gorgeous mountains were illuminated with purple hues and the pink-orange Sky cast a golden light onto the trail. The cactus were in full force too. The course started with a fast downhill 50k and then started rolling in the hills. We went out fast, but surprisingly the 8 min or faster pace felt like a breeze despite not running for three weeks. I cruised through the first two aid stations, intensely focused on pushing hard and squeezing my butt so it fired properly. I could feel a niggle in my back but mostly ignored it. I could handle that. For some reason, there weren't any gu at the aid stations so I stuffed my pockets with gummy worms and chomped on those. My stomach felt great and so did my legs. I was actually on PR marathon pace and felt great. I tried not to get too excited that early. 

Around mile 16, the jarring little dips in the trail got to me. My back started to really hurt and it greatly slowed me down. I had to stop several times cause the pain was too much. I tried to do my PT exercises but to no avail. I pressed on to see if it would dissipate. I knew that when the pain was giving me chills (it was probs 75-80F at that point), it was time to quit. I dropped at the 20mile aid station. Taylor swift sang "Should've Said No. Should've gone home. Should've thought twice before you let it all go" as I walked it in. That girl knows me too well. 

These rockstars went 1-2. boom!

Going into this weekend, I knew it would take a miracle to finish. The dreams and confidence I had built over this training cycle were so large that my hope burned too brightly to be easily extinguished. In my pre race freak out texting Stephanie, I knew that I had to pull the plug if it got bad; I didn't want to be out longer than I should or regret not trying.

Sitting at the aid station talking to the medic, I was oddly calm. I knew a drop was unavoidable and I am completely fine with it. The grief and anguish I had experienced the previous Sunday thinking that I wouldn't even go to Arizona, was insurmountable. But I did. I made it there. I was on the start line and ran 20 miles better than I have in a race feeling better than ever. I knew my fitness was great, but this injury held me back. I gave it my all and I tried my best. I couldn't ask for anything more and I'm extremely grateful to have had the opportunity to try. 

Now I need to start the healing process and make my body stronger than before. I'm so lucky to have amazing friends surround me and help me through the depressing reality of injuries. I have a couple ideas for this year and I'm really excited for what's to come. 

Shenanigans

Huge congrats to Keely for almost stealing the overall W in the 60k and the winners of the golden tickets in the 100k. It was a brutally hot day and tough course, and I have so much respect for every starter and finisher. Kudos to Aravaipa Running and Jamil Coury for putting on a fab event. Post race was fantastic, Keely, Hillary and I hit up the downtown Tempe scene and drank/danced until I had to make my flight to SFO. The tequila induced clubbing had some great laughs. Now to make up my homework and eat half priced chocolate...

Big thanks to all the support and encouragement I've gotten along the way up to and through this. I really, really appreciate it. Major props to TNF & Victory Sportsdesign (too bad I didn't get to use my drop bag) & Julbo USA, as well as the love from Sisugirls & Stance.

West is Best

Balance.

Recently I published a blog post for SisuGirls on balance. It's hard to attain and I have to keep reminding myself to continuously practice the art of reaching for it. As I am coming back from a tough injury that has put my dreams on hold for a bit, I need to practice what I preach with even more vigor. If I get swept up in negative thinking, taking on too much, and not properly recovering the body & mind, I definitely go a little crazy. Anxiety attacks are a real and common thing in my world. Sometimes all I need to do is just sit down on the trail for a bit and deep breathe. Connecting back to why I am out there brings me back to the present and makes for more quality time spent outside and in my work.

Here is the blog post.

It is 7:15 pm. The sun is setting, and I sit in my car at the trailhead, still in my clothes from work. I let out a long audible sigh though nobody is around to hear it. I am tired, I have a lot of homework, and I would rather go home to make dinner and drift into a magical dreamland. But I have goals, dreams, and the will to be much greater than I am. And so the trail beckons and my footsteps soon hit the crunchy gravel.

Why do we do this? Why do we choose pain and discomfort from the regular mundane? It’s because adventurous people cannot sit still. We thrive from working hard, sweating daily, and that feeling of accomplishment. Adventurous people are both intrinsically motivated and intrinsically satisfied.

So, how do we do it? How can we pursue goals, adventure, and an outdoor lifestyle while still adhering to the expectations of the regular world? The answer is simple: finding balance.

I have thought about this often and thoroughly. But after watching a short film created by my friends and sisters in sports, Stephanie Howe & Ashley Arnold, I decided to put pen to paper and write it out concretely.

To attain balance, here are some tips I try to follow:

BE GOAL ORIENTED.

I find I can pursue my absolute best when I set goals for myself. I like to make micro and macro goals. For instance, I ask myself, what can I do this week, this month? What do I want to accomplish? Is it a full work week with two long runs on the weekend? For my macro goals, I like to dream big. What exciting adventure am I saving up for? When I graduate, what career do I want to pursue? Sometimes those lofty dreams can seem super far away in the moment, so having micro goals help to keep the workflow going smoothly and to grant minor successes along the way.

REWARD YOURSELF.

Setting standards for yourself and being disciplined isn’t sustainable in the long run unless you give yourself a reward now and then. These can go hand in hand with your micro and macro goals. For example, I strive to do my school work diligently and adhere to my training schedule each week. So after I have finished studying and completed my long run, I will indulge in my favorite dark chocolate almonds or a mocha latte. My macro goals are almost rewards in itself. When I graduate college, I want to spend the summer in Europe training for my ultimate goal: The Ultra Trail du Mont Blanc 100 mile. Playing in the Alps will be my treat for studying hard and finishing my classes.

BE FLEXIBLE.

It’s okay; life happens. Failing to do a task or not completing a goal is totally fine. Everybody goes through this, and it always provides a lesson. There are days when I cannot get out to the trails because of work or school. One day off will not kill you or completely set you back. Stepping back and relaxing is even encouraged once in a while. If you have too much going on, pursuing mental health and stability is of much greater importance.

MAKE IT A HABIT.

As a student, my life is constantly on the go. But budgeting time and thinking ahead helps me get things done in work and play. Making things routine may seem to revert life back to the mundane and regular, but that’s where the reward system comes in to spice it up! I always change the location of my Saturday morning run to keep it interesting. They say it takes 21 days to create a habit. So when it gets hard, don’t lose hope. It WILL get easier.

HAVE FUN!

The whole point of why we are out there is because we love it! Stopping to look at vistas, picking flowers, and jumping around on rocks lets me connect back to my original purpose of playing outside. Everything you are doing, you should be doing because you love it.

Around 9:00 pm, I arrive back to the trailhead. Breathless, sweaty, dirty, and with rosy cheeks. I am grinning. I ran fast up one hill, and I almost tripped on a few rocks. A flower, almost dead from a beating, is strewn across my hair. It was blooming in the sunset, and I just had to pick it. It is now dark, and I didn’t get to study as much as I wanted for that one test tomorrow, but the happiness and triumph from my heart furiously beating is worth so much more.

White (Out) River 50 Mile; Race Report.

My last long race at Leona Divide 50m was less than ideal. I had worked very hard focused a lot of energy on that being my A race. Long story short, it was a shit show and I stopped at an aid station halfway wanting to quit for 45 minutes. Now that I am training for a 100 miles, which is more of a mental marathon than physical, I wanted to have a race in between Leona Divide and Pine to Palm 100. I wanted a good memory and something positive to fall back on in moments of self doubt and negativity, as I would be dumb to say those won’t happen.

Bend... Just stop.

Running with Steph, Riley & Jack

This summer I have been kept super busy working in the lab and running a lot with friends over the weekends. So, I hadn’t thought much about my impending, redeeming, 50 mile race: White River. Last weekend I went on some really quality training runs near Bend, OR. Every time I go, I fall more in love with that area. On Saturday, I ran around Green Lakes and Soda Creek trails on a gorgeous day; I felt like I was floating. Sunday I ran with Stephanie (Howe) & Zach Violett and their super in shape dog, Riley. Seriously, Riley can definitely kick my butt any day. We ran this awesome loop around 3 Finger Jack. It was gorgeous but I bonked so hard as it was 100% exposed and very hot.

The day before the race, I got off work early and drove to Crystal Mountain Resort in Mt Rainier Natl Park, WA. The drive through gorgeous mountains alone had me drooling and wishing for a 48 hour adventure run rather than a race. I got to the resort in time to hear a course briefing from Scott McCoubrey, RD, and get checked in. I ate my Tupperware dinner and crawled into my sleeping bag in the back of my car.

Off & Running! PC Glenn Tachiyama

Love this girl!

6 am the race was off. For some odd reason, I led the women’s pack at mile 1. I did not intend to go out any faster than I felt was good for me. I got passed by a LOT of people in the first couple miles. Whatever, I thought, I’ll catch back up, they’ll fade back, we still have 46 more miles to go… After 5k, the course started winding up, up, up. For ten miles, I had my hands on my knees and huffed around switchbacks on the first climb. It was cold, wet, windy, and I felt like I was sucking supremely. Not again, I thought, why can’t I nail the 50 mile distance? Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed running along huge cliffs, by waterfalls, up steep stairs, and through the mud. The forest in the rain and fog is one of my favorite spots to be. However, for that climb, I was not having a good day. I felt so tired, heavy and slow. It was very frustrating. I didn’t let the thought of quitting enter my mind, but by the time we started heading back on the OAB section, I had decided today would be good 100 mile practice: long time on my feet, not feeling good, and just getting it done. Sigh.

Scott's Course Map

Fortunately, at that point, I had started running with two other women, Monica Ochs & Sarah Parker. We commiserated that we weren’t having the days we had hoped for, but filled that whole downhill with great conversation. Both women were nurses and so I had a lot of questions for them as well. By the time we hit mile 27 Aid station, my outlook had become a lot more positive. Unfortunately, I had become happy and fine with just running to finish the darn thing, but then a volunteer had to go and tell me I was 12^th woman. Drat. Now that the possibility of making top ten entered my mind, I dropped my complacent attitude and started running a little faster.

We had another long climb and I surprised myself by running most of the way up it. I knew we had a downhill then 10km to the finish, both things I estimated I could coast on, so I had to really put in the work on the hill. On the way up, I passed a lot of people to the tune of David Guetta and Spanish flamenco. Near the top of the hill, I came upon a woman in blue. I hiked/ran behind her for quite some time. Neither of us giving an inch. We went on like this for a long while until we came to a little bit of a downhill (a major fakeout before a steep pitch to Suntop- the last bit of the climb). I burst around her and sprinted as hard as I could down the trail. The mud made it a bit of an extreme slip n slide, but I made it upright, with grace and poise. I also gapped her a little. However, she very persistently followed me on that steep part to the aid station. We arrived at the same time and she opened her pack to have her bladder filled. Seizing this opportunity, I grabbed one gel and took off.

Course profile. I clocked it at 9500' gain.

This is where I put on the hurt. From Suntop, the course winds down a fire road for several miles to the last aid station. I hurled myself as fast as I could down the road. I kept looking over my shoulder and would see a blue figure emerging from the white mist. I hugged the turns as best I could to try to put physical objects like trees, in between us. Usually, when one loses sight of a competitor they are chasing, they start to give up. This downhill was painful, I was running as fast as I could and already had 37-44 miles on my legs. A bit of the way down, I really had to go to the bathroom. I weighed my options: A. I could quickly put on the brakes and pull over. Ouch. B. I could pull over, but then the girls I had just passed would catch up. Or C, my most appealing option, just pee my pants. I mean, it was raining after all, and I thought it would only be just a tinkle… Well. At least I was hydrating!

 

What we should have seen at Suntop. PC Seattle Running Club

I was pretty happy to be done with that first climb...

The road started to flatten out and I caught sight of another woman. I don’t know why, but I had kept telling myself that each time I caught someone, I had just gotten 10^th place; I would need to seriously work hard to not let top ten slip… In reality, I had no idea what place I was in. This mindset kept me edging closer to her. We came into the final AS together, and once again, I took off. However, she stayed right behind me. We managed a couple sentences here and there before she gapped me a bit. I switched my ipod until it came to Taylor Swift and put my head down. I had made a goal for myself that I needed to break 9 hours. Suddenly, my head was filled with Swiftian boy rage and calculating exactly what my maximum pace had to be in order to break 9. I caught up to the woman in yellow and passed her. Soon, another woman. Taylor Swift kept lamenting about how she knows places as I wound my way alone through the woods. This last 10km really was a kick in the balls with wet rock, logs, roots, and constant up and down. I had no idea where I was directionally, geographically, and if I was near the finish. The rushing of the White River (it really is white) and the soft crunching of moss and leaves underfoot and the swirling wind and rain in the canopy was peaceful. It was like a metronome consistently pulling me through the never-ending forest.

All business

As the clock ticked on, I grew more and more agitated that I wouldn’t make the cutoff I had set for myself. I made little promises to myself- okay, you can hike ten steps here, you can have oreos when you are done, you can accomplish one of your goals for the day… (Because apparently I was still thinking I wasn’t top ten). Just before the trail emptied out onto the familiar road leading into the campground, I saw another woman. FML. Now I was gonna have to sprint for it. I let it out. I put everything I had into that last half mile, and not an ounce less. I crossed the line at 8:56 in 5^th place (33^rd overall and 3^rd in my 20-29 age group). I was so happy to be done.

The more I think about this race, the more proud I am over how hard I pushed and raced the second half. I passed at least 7 women in the last 20 miles and didn’t let up. I am so fortunate to have met some awesome people at the race- I love new friends! And experience a super tough course with amazing volunteers and atmosphere. Once again, the people in this community make every experience a happy, positive, and humble one! Super grateful for my coach, Meghan, giving me a ton of last minute words of wisdom and getting me to the start AND finish line. I would be still lost in the fog without her (literally and figuratively).

Strava data HERE.

Gear used:

-TNF Stow N Go Bra, BTN shorts/ singlet, visor, arm sleeves

-Stance socks & Pearl Izumi Trail N2

-Garmin 910XT

-Salomon Sense vest

-1 Gu gel every thirty minutes, including on the start line, 3 S! caps, & approx. 10 dixie cups of coke

Gear I wish I used:

-gloves & buff 

Catching Up on a Race, Crew & Adventure Report

Legend... wait for it.... Dary. PC Joe McCladdie

Misty redwoods with Billy Yang PC Joe McCladdie

So life has gotten in the way of writing about the adventures I'm having. (Thankfully not getting in the way of adventures!)  Last I wrote, I had just paced Rory Bosio in a 100 mile race through the Chilean Atacama desert. Not two days back in SLO, I repacked my bag and drove up to Auburn for the Western States training camp weekend. It was a blast to run the last 75 miles of such an amazing course, and with the leisure of three days. The new and old friends I spent time with always make me appreciate our community. I am always, always blown away by the open arms and kindness shown to me by runners. It's like we have this special bond allowing us to feel these familial ties.

Girl Power PC Billy Yang

After being blissfully unaware of reality, I had to put my head down and finish up the school year strong. I had so much makeup work to do and studying for finals that not much else happened... Until finals week itself...

Wednesday of finals week, in June I turned 21. Finally. However, partying downtown and drinking all the beer I wanted did not happen as I had two finals in the following two days. BUT, since I did not have class, my lovely friends- Tera, Jody, and  Brandon- and I went for an epic run in Big Sur. we ran from sea level to 5500' up Cone Peak in a giant, 27 mile loop. We spent the entire day out there enjoying each other's company, the trees, the views, the few creek crossings, and so much more. My heart was so happy; I could not have asked for a better birthday. Tera brought a shot of Fireball whiskey for the top of Cone Peak in a soft flask and I had to take the shot halfway through the run. Gross. After we finished, we enjoyed ciders and the sunset over the ocean. I got a little drunk and ended up dancing along the highway 1 while waiting for Brandon to make his way back. (Long story short: He got lost and finished a couple hours later- he's OK though)

Cone Peak & BFFs 

Poppin' bottles on the side of Hwy 1

Finals wrapped themselves up neatly and pretty soon I found myself driving SLO to Portland with my belongings. This summer, I will be researching Leukemia in the Phil Knight Cancer Inst. at Oregon Health & Science Uni. I am so excited to have received this opportunity to work in a lab with some of the leading minds in cancer research. My world has been blown away by all the amazing resources, toys, and opportunities presented. From here until August 9-5 Monday through Friday, I will be learning and hopefully contributing to the search for finding a cure.

All smiles 1 mile in...

All official & shit.

Miles of Smiles in Forests

Crater Lake in all it's glory

On Fridays, I have been hitting the road and exploring some pretty rad places in Oregon. The first weekend I was here, I ran a 50km race: Mary’s Peak, just outside of Corvallis. It was a beautifully put on event and I met a lot of really cool folks in the area. The race went well for me. I had been tired from all that had been going on in May as well as school/traveling. I didn’t feel too great with headaches, stomach cramps, but I think that took the edge off the pain I was experiencing while running hard. I didn’t know the course, the competition, and had very little expectations other than to just run hard. I took in my fuel every 40 minutes and carried a water bottle. The course started with two miles screaming down a fire road then immediately jumping on a singletrack to run 3000’ up to mile 8, which was situated right on the summit of Mary’s peak. Winding through redwoods and then emerging onto a grassy summit with more wild daisies than one could imagine, I was greeted with gorgeous views 360 degrees of the Cascades and the ocean. There wasn’t much time to appreciate the view and pat myself on the back for summiting, as the race quickly turns downhill and back into the forest. I felt alive and an exhilarating freedom I hadn’t felt in a while. Floating fast over roots on a singletrack, the course went down until around mile 12. It rolled on for quite some time with little blips of ass-kicking steep climbs, which took all of 10 steps.

My new buddy, La Fawnduh

Mile 12 had an aid station, and apparently there was another at mile 17.5, but no; it didn’t come until mile 21. So, I had kinda dug myself into a dehydration hole. It didn’t affect me too much, other than slowing me down a bit. Around mile 23, there was a very steep, mile long hill that was littered with fallen trees. The trees, being at the perfect width and height, could neither be crawled under nor hopped over. So of course, I had to stop in my tracks and heave myself across the logs. At this point in the race, I was passing many of the 25km runners and several guys who had faded back from the 50km. The woman in front of me in the 50km race, Emily, had stayed at the exact same distance the whole time- constantly 7 minutes ahead. At some point in the later miles- around 27- I started to fall apart and knew I wouldn’t catch her. I kept running hard, but the final climb in the open, exposed, hot sun just about killed me. It was really a bitch-slap to the face. But, I survived. I ran 5:02, which tied the previous course record for second female and 8th overall. Emily went on to break her own course record for the win. It was a beautiful long day in the forest and exploring. My Uncle even came out to help volunteer, and it was so great to spend time with him and introduce him to trail ultra events. Strava data HERE.

The Queen & her ladies in waiting PC Tim Fitz

"Bouclair Sandwich!" PC Denise

The next weekend, I actually popped back down to California for a certain party going 100miles Squaw-Auburn. I spent all day Saturday crewing for The Queen- my amazing, fearless, and beautiful coach Meghan Arbogast. Her friend and Pacer #1 Andrea Thorpe remained my buddy for the day. She was calm, cool & collected while I was a nervous Nelly frantic to see Meghan. Maybe I had a little too much energy… Meghan ran sub 24 hours for her NINTH WS100 finish and was so inspiring to watch. I loved, loved, loved being there to see everything and soak in the race and our sport’s history- it was my first start-finish WS100 race experience! I am always taken aback by the incredulous perseverance, determination, and grit displayed by athletes as they put their bodies and minds over the cliff’s edge to test their limits. Rob Krar barely missing the CR on a hot day, Magda in her 100 mi debut, Kaci running so strong the entire day, Gunhild Swanson making the cutoff at SEVENTY years old! (Can I be her when I grow up?), Meghan gutting it out despite thinking she had a broken toe, and seeing ALL my friends! WS100 was certainly a party. Whether they were running, crewing, pacing, or just spectating, I felt like every person in the ultra community I have known & loved was out there! As well as multiple new friends!

South Sister with the other Siblings next door

Lil D recovers from WS100 with South Sister. NBD

This Cali girl hasn't seen snow in a while...

The next two weekends were filled with camping and running adventures. Denise Bourassa and her hubby Ken kindly let me stay at their house in Bend one weekend and took me on a gorgeous tour of South Sister and Green Lakes. Their friend, Scott Wolfe, took me on another tour of the last 20 miles of the Waldo 100k course. Then I camped with Denise and Ken the next weekend up near Timothy Lake by Mt Hood! (Shocked they aren’t tired of me yet) Saturday I spent 35 miles out and back on the PCT. The first and last 9 I got to run with Denise- love that woman- and ate chocolate peanut butter covered oreos at mile 30. (holy goodness I got transported to another world).

35 miles on the PCT does not disappoint.

Sunday, I accidentally found myself at the Columbia River Gorge and went for an out and back run up to Larch Mountain. It was super steep on the way up, so I took my time enjoying the trees and gorgeous waterfalls. Coming back down I was relieved to be moving a bit faster over the technical terrain as I was running out of daylight and unprepared for the dark. I came around a corner and stopped dead in my tracks. Leaning up against a Redwood tree, I put my arm around it in an almost embrace. I was about 3000’ above the River and could see the sunset through the green, lush trees. The last rays of golden sunlight emanated off the green branches as the clouds slowly brightened to deeper pinks and purples. The forest was still and a bird call could be heard somewhere below me. A stream trickled nearby over some rocks. It was an emotional moment and a fabulous end to the weekend.

 

OH SO GREEN 

Why run 5 miles to finish Waldo when you can stay here?