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| Shaking it out with Fernando! |
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| Prerace: clean, a little warm, & confident |
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| "Multicolored nails are the secrets to success"- Rory Bosio |
Thursday Jan 8th, I flew to San Antonio and met
up with Fernando, a great friend from SF. We drove to Bandera and stayed the
night just outside of town. I wore a single long sleeve, two different types of
gloves and shorts on our Friday shakeout to test how cold it really was. My mom flew into Texas that
night as she would crew for me all Saturday. Pretty soon it was race morning
and I was sitting nervously sipping coffee. HERE is the women’s race preview.
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| I had to put my age group bib on my butt.... |
The gun went off and we went racing up the trail. The sun
had just risen and it was still very, very cold. We immediately began climbing
up the first hill. It was short, but the rocks were like stairs and the
previous day’s rainfall had given them a nice fresh coat of ice. I settled with
a couple women: Aliza and I think Nicole, but then they moved up and I joined
another couple women: Leslie, Ashley & Traci. We were talking casually and
getting to know each other. One of the funnier moments of the day was, I think
it was Leslie and Ashley, were talking about how many/how old their kids were.
They then asked me if I had any kids, to which I frantically responded “No! I’m
twenty!!” Then they asked me if I was married! Haha! Not even close!
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| Where do I put these gels? (PC Victor B.) |
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| This was the start- as none of us were covered in blood... |
The first 15 miles or so were uneventful. Traci and I were
rolling along and chatting some. The sotol was alive and well on the trail,
which quickly bloodied up our legs pretty good. (She had pants so she didn’t
really feel it). In these first 17 or so miles I was running relatively well,
but it wasn’t with the ease I felt at TNF50. The trail was rocky, covered in
ice, slick mud, or clay-like mud that sticks to your shoes, making them feel
like bricks. Traci pulled away from me and I soon got into a rhythm with
another guy, who happened to be from the Bay Area. We chatted some, but around
mile 26, I started to feel really really crappy. My legs were hurting on the
brutally steep, rocky downhills and the climbs were very steep as well. I was
losing it mentally and I was cold. I really wanted to drop at the 50k. I had
been thinking about it all those miles leading up to it. But I was also
thinking about all the people back home cheering me on and supporting me. Also,
I though about calling my coach Meghan post-drop and trying to explain to her
why I had to DNF. None of my reasons were good enough and I just couldn’t bring
myself to do it. I didn’t want to let anyone down and I didn’t have any
physical ailment hindering me other than it just sucked and I was tired. (My
foot pain- didn’t feel it once!) Once I got to 50k, my mom and Victor
Ballesteros were there. I grabbed two advil, more Gu, a Clif Double Shot
Espresso and was turned around so quickly I didn’t have a chance to drop. So I
figured I might as well finish it…
Heading up the first hill, I was greeted with more &
more Sotol. I learned I was in 7th place and Leslie and Traci were
hot on my tail. I had passed Traci heading up to the climbs towards the 50k
mark and Leslie ran into the start/finish as I was headed out for the second
loop. I saw a woman in all Buff gear climbing up. This further gave me
motivation and I used a burst of speed to pass her. On the downhill, I smoked
her; she was daintily avoiding the rocks whereas I just hurdled them. Soon, I
couldn’t see her behind me and relaxed a bit. The game plan was to take the
first 50k conservatively, use the second loop to move and give it my all on the
last 10 miles especially. Pretty soon, I was running by myself with nobody to
be seen and along rolling, gray, boring terrain. That part was tough. I had my
ipod to keep me company.
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| Coming into Last chance at mi 26. |
I came into the aid station at mile 42 and asked what place
I was and how far ahead the others were. They didn’t know how far ahead they
were, but I was now in 5th place as Melanie had just dropped. I knew
5th and 4th were together at the 50k, so I figured she
couldn’t be much farther ahead. I tried running faster and making up lost time,
but I was so depleted and the mud and ice didn’t allow for very fast running. I
had a glimmer of hope that I may be able to get the MUC spot. I kept repeating
my mantras: Meghan had told me to “Be F**king Tough” and I kept telling myself
“C’mon, you want this more than anything, where’s your hunger & fire?” The
sotol stopped burning and I just didn’t give a sh*t anymore that I was going
through a forest of razor blades.
I got to the first Cross Roads aid station a little out of
sorts and was a bit rough with my mom and short of patience. I took off on the
next, rockier part of that little loop and noticed my water tasted really
funny. I couldn’t quite understand why: was I hungry? Was it just bad tap
water? Will I get sick from it? I kept sipping it regardless to stay hydrated.
Later, I found out when I asked my mom to put salt caps in my bottle (I meant
the holder pocket), she had put a handful of them in the actual bottle with the
water; I was basically drinking clean ocean water. Ha!
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| The snow-rain had washed most of it off... |
I soon, finished that loop and before I knew it I was back
at cross roads. I grabbed my headlamp and headed out for the last ten miles.
Game time. I “sped” up (it’s all relative at this point) and kept trying to
push myself up and over the climbs. It was really hard at that point. My quads
were toast, but I had no idea how far ahead the other women were. My next goal,
when I realized I wouldn’t get the MUC spot (I tried not to let this derail me)
was to break 11 hours, I was borderline on pace for it, but it was definitely going
to be a push. When I hit Last Chance with 5 miles to go and the two worst
climbs of the course, I was gunning it. I took another Double Shot espresso and
ran as hard as I could. I couldn’t even stop to pee really quickly because I
was so focused on finishing. I was so so close! The minutes ticked by even
closer to 11 hours and I was still a bit farther out. It was pure anguish at
that point. Three of my favorite songs came on, by chance, to take me in:
Santana’s “Smooth”, Madonna’s “4 minutes” (fitting for the time frame), and
Taylor Swift’s “Shake it Off”. The final descent came and I was sprinting (again,
relatively) at that point. I didn’t care if I was stubbing my toes on the rocks;
I just had to get over them as fast as I could possibly muster. I wasn’t even
on the homestretch before tears came unknowingly. I ran across the line right
into my mom’s arms. (No fetal position with Victor to console me this time!)
The race director, Joe Prusaitis, asked how old I was and then remarked to the
crowd how he needs to start carding at his races (a 19 yr old ran to 3rd
place). I was given my awards and we drove to the best and only taqueria in
Bandera (my mom, Fernando and I).
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| Looking a little Traumatized |
I had finished 13th overall, 5th woman
(4th USATF woman), with a time of 11:01.50. (Oh so close). It’s
bitingly disappointing to not achieve my goals and not get a spot to Western
States 100 (Especially when it was 34 minutes away), but given the conditions
and tough as nails competition, I am happy with this accomplishment. I guess I
ran a 100k & 50 mi PR, my 2nd fastest 50k & 4th
fastest 50k… (5:20 & 5:41). I’m pretty humbled and glad to have overcome
mental canyons. This blog post was pretty hard to write; I am still feeling
upset and down. Most people are asking what is next, and I have no idea. Maybe
pursue a spot to WS somewhere else? It’s a tough call. Five weeks between a
50miler and this was hard to do, I don’t know if I can do it again. I am
definitely aiming to do a 100 this summer, it’s just difficult to know at the moment.
So, I guess stay tuned…
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| His name is "Waffles" |
As always, I am oh so grateful to my supportive family,
friends, and community. My mom came to crew me and did a fabulous job of
putting up with me and keeping me decently happy for 11 hours, then taking on
the mom role of taking care of me post race. All my friends supporting and
encouraging me back home was really motivating and I definitely wouldn’t have
the strength to finish without thoughts of all of you. Fernando is truly an
amazing travel companion and I’d be so lost without him pretty much organizing
the trip. World’s best coach award goes to Meghan Arbogast; her advice,
knowledge, and friendship means the world to me and I’m so happy to have The
Queen as a role model to learn from. Huge shoutout to The North Face for
creating amazing gear that kept me warm and content all day long. I’d also like
to say I’m super excited to be a part of Julbo’s family for 2015, repping the
sickest shades on the market. (They matched perfectly with my outfit) As well
as on Petzl’s regional team; I’d be crawling blindly through the hills without
the RXP headlamp.
For all those curious, data-analyzing folks out there, HERE
is my strava data. Also, HERE is the post race interview with Victor
Ballesteros & UltraSportsLive.tv (Note: I am not all “there”, as I
literally had JUST finished…)
Gear Used:
Garmin 910xt
Julbo sunglasses- Access
SFRC buff
TNF Ultra Cardiac shoes
TNF rain jacket, light windbreaker, arm sleeves, T shirt,
skirt, gloves, Stow N Go Bra
Stance mid-calf compression socks
Petzl Tikka RXP
Nutrition:
4 dixie cups of coke
Water
S! Caps (1 every hour plus the ones mixed in my water…)
Gu Energy Gel & Clif Double Shot Espresso (1 gel every
30 minutes)
Kelsie thank you for being an inspiration! Don't get too down on yourself!
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